Tuesday, May 11, 2010

The Mary Poppins bag of tricks... and miscellaneous junk

Last year, I bought my first Italian leather bag. This is not a wanky exposé of some tart’s fabulous wardrobe and accessories, because the truth is, I am a member of a not-so-elitist league: broke university students. When embarking on shopping adventures, I start with my regular Saturday morning garage sale circuit, move on to clothes swap events, and end up rummaging the one dollar bin at the local RSPCA charity shop. So, as a university student, buying an Italian leather bag seems like a particularly stupid expenditure, but working for a place that sells them at wholesale prices, why not, huh?

Getting back on track, in all its gorgeousness (apparently, ‘gorgeousness’ is a word. Well, according to Spell Check, anyway) this bag was, and still is, inevitably flawed, bringing to light an interesting dichotomy that I am absolutely positive that many women, and perhaps men, have also struggled with: aesthetics versus practicality.

OK, so my phone will start ringing, and like Mary Poppins and her delightful bag of trinkets and treasures, I toss the contents of my handbag over my shoulder, only to find that I have missed the call, anyway. However, unlike the enchantment of Poppins’ goodie bag and the assembly of all her bits and pieces, fashionably organised within the children's room (she’s gotta’ hook me up!), I am left with a mess of miscellaneous junk scattered around me. Old lip glosses, peanut butter M&M wrappers (I would by far prefer to litter my handbag than the environment. Does my justification erase the fact that my bag is slowly becoming my own personal, mobile garbage bin? Anyone know of a fitted bin liner, designed for handbags?), coins, dust, and busted pens. This bag is terribly gorgeous, yet the practicality is closely similar to that of a potato sack - a pretty schmick potato sack, all the same.

My big, beautiful bag: a dungeon for innate objects, dirt, dust and wait.. what’s that? Something damp? Dang it! How the hell does Mary Poppins do it?!


I wonder if Peaches Geldof has the same probelm I have?

1 comment:

  1. 1. Peaches Geldof is the scum of the earth. 2. The story of your badly battered Louis Vuitton bag surely deserves its own post. 3. In America, SPCA is an animal shelter. 4. If you got the chance to mug Mary Poppins (and who hasn't dreamed of having that opportunity? I kid!), but you were only allowed to steal one accessory...surely the umbrella is the way to go. A mangled ring toe wouldn't be so bad if you could fly. :P