Note to self - and other party-goers out there: do NOT wear open-toed shoes if you plan on a night of dancing and debauchery. I made this simple, yet costly mistake, and two weeks after the ‘incident’, the toe inside of the pinkie on my right foot is still beaten up and bruised. Fortunately, this toe is sort of like an appendix; it doesn’t issue or make a vast contribution to the way I live my life, although, when this rogue extension of human matter is uncomfortably pressed, it can truly be a pain in the, um...foot.
OK, so I’m not looking for any sort of attention or sympathy; I am merely writing to warn people of something so terrible that threatens your physical stability (I mean, seriously; with crushed toes, how can you physically balance?), and your shoe-wearing agenda: drunk tarts strutting around in stilettos.